


You will find me where it's quiet. Listen closely

by syri_chii



Category: Arashi (Band), Johnny's Entertainment
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-29
Updated: 2012-09-29
Packaged: 2017-11-15 06:40:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/524226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/syri_chii/pseuds/syri_chii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a thin line between reality and dreams.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You will find me where it's quiet. Listen closely

**Author's Note:**

> I was having thoughts whether I should post this here or the other but at the end this should be here and maybe someone(aside from Kai and Cy, of course) will find this interesting. This is the first fic I've written for kokkaii @LJ for Arashi Exchange however I've thought it wasn't fit from the prompts given. Unbeta'ed. Contains psychological themes. More notes at the bottom. And title is from Olivia Lufkin's 'A Little Pain.' yep, my mind is so creative when it comes to title. ^^;

Monsters are real, and ghosts are real too. They live inside of us, and sometimes, they win.  
\- Stephen King

 

Nino's eyelids flutter. His left hand moves a little. His eyes slowly open, adjusting to the light. It appears to be the place is too bright for him. He tries to close them then reopens. He hears something beeping beside him. His other arm feels strange like it's heavy when he tries to move it.

When he finally regains a clear vision, panic starts to set in as he realizes he is in a hospital. He tries to talk but discovers a tube is placed on his mouth, preventing him to do so. Instead he makes a small sound enough to alert the person in the other room. He reaches for the tube and tries to pull it out. Just in time, the nurse appears and stops him.

"Ninomiya-san, please calm down," the nurse tells while Nino struggles. He wants to get out of this place. Then he freezes when the next person enters, tall but skinny since the last time he saw (wait, when was it?)

"Kazu,"

Nino mumbles the name of the person even though it's difficult for him. He doesn't notice the tranquilizer injected to him.

"Ma--saki,"

\----

_The apartment complex looked old-fashioned nevertheless Nino thought it was nice, maybe because of the ambiance it was emitting. The location was good too. There's a 24-hour convenience store two blocks away and a grocery store three blocks. There's a nearby park and playground for children. He had noticed those while he was looking around for the address._

_He turned off the engine and got off the motorcycle. He fetched his clipboard and the package on the back then went to the complex._

_Room 327_

_It was the last door on the hallway. He pressed the doorbell and waited. Nothing happened. Nino pressed again the doorbell this time longer and then waited. Still, nothing happened. He was about to press for the last time when the door suddenly swung opened. Nino instantly stepped back._

_A guy wearing a bright red jersey over a green tracksuit showed up._

_"Aiba-san?"_

_The guy nodded. Nino got his clipboard, handed to Aiba-san. "Please sign here." He pointed the space beside the name. The guy signed and gave the clipboard back to Nino who in turn handed the package._

_Nino made one last look before he excused himself._

_What a weird guy._

_\----_

_"Hi."_

_Nino lifted his eyes from the magazine he's flipping without interest to find the 'tracksuit' guy standing on the other side of the counter._

_"You're working here too?"_

_Nino slightly nodded. He put down the magazine and stood up. He saw the two bentos and a pack of beer. He got them and punched to the system._

_"That will be nine hundred fifty-eight."_

_The tracksuit guy was shocked as he was caught staring at Nino so fumbled through his pocket for the money. He handed the bills to Nino who took it without saying a word._

_"You don't talk a lot."_

_No, I don't feel talking, was what Nino thought as he handed the package._

_"Funny because I imagined you like talking. You seemed to be the person who'll say what's on your mind."_

_"Look, can't you guess I'm not in the mood to talk with strangers?" Nino, in the end couldn't help himself._

_The tracksuit guy looked at him then smiled sheepishly. "I'll just come back then. I'm so sorry." He said then grabbed the plastic bag and walked out the store._

_Something was telling Nino that it wouldn't be the last time he'd be seeing that guy._

_\----_

_"Are you stalking me?"_

_The guy with dark shades was startled when Nino turned around to face him. The guy looked around as if wondering if Nino was talking to another person._

_"I'm talking to you."_

_The guy pointed himself, asking silently. Nino raised his eyebrow then nodded. The guy grinned embarrassedly before he took off the large shades attracting a lot of attention in the music store._

_"I didn't guess you'll notice me."_

_Nino wanted to counter that it's not that difficult to notice him because of his get-up but he decided to hold his tongue for now._

_"You have a lot of part-time jobs, don't you get tired?"_

_"So you really are stalking me."_

_The guy chuckled, "Yes, okay. I confess. You remind me of someone from a long time ago. Let's be friends."_

_It made Nino paused and raised his gaze to look at the guy._

_Is he serious?_

_"I'm Aiba Masaki but of course you already know that," he said, extending his hand to Nino._

_"Ninomiya."_

_Aiba stared at Nino, waiting._

_"Kazunari," he mumbled then swiftly turned around to return to his work._

_Aiba broke into smile. Nino wasn't sure if it meant something._

_\----_

There's only the sound of a steady beeping of the monitor. Aside from that is nothing else. The silence surrounding the room is uncomfortable for Jun but he decides he has to endure it.

"All his vital signs are stable and within the normal limits. However, he has yet to show any signs of waking up."

"Is there --"

A sharp breath draws before the following words come out.

"What are his chances of waking up?"

The doctor doesn't answer promptly. "Very little." His voice sounds a little grim. "It takes a miracle to come out from coma."

They do not talk after that. The doctor excuses himself, leaving Jun watches the patient inside surrounded by different machines and attached to various contraptions.

"When will you wake up, Nino?"

 

\---

 

_"Don't you have anything to do?"_

_Nino asked as he sorted the newly arrived CDs on the shelves. Aiba was standing behind him, checking out an album of a boy group wearing suits and stripes._

_"Watching you is what I do."_

_"I mean, work? Don't you have one?"_

_"My work is to watch over you."_

_Nino turned around and found Aiba with headphones on; listening to the album he was checking earlier. He approached him, snagged the headphones from Aiba's ears._

_"Go find something else to do. I don't want to see you when I come back." He said then scurried away, leaving Aiba confused._

_Nino felt a little bad talking to Aiba like that. Lately, his mood was off and when he needed to vent out, Aiba was present, ever present to his sight._

_When he came back, Aiba was gone. He went behind the counter and started to play some videogame. After several minutes, he stopped. He just kept on dying._

_He was in a foul mood the whole day._

_\----_

_"I'll keep you safe."_

_Nino hears someone whisper to him. He tries to open his eyes but cannot do it._

_"You'll be safe here, away from those things. I want you to be here, if only…”_

_Nino feels his body calm down. His heartbeat returns to normal and his breathing evens out. Then he senses a gentle touch on his forehead and someone squeezes his hand gently._

_"Nino."_

_\----_

_"I'm Nino's lucky charm," Aiba said one night while they were eating in a fast food chain. "When you're with me, nothing bad will happen to you. What? You don't believe me, do you?"_

_Instead of answering, Nino stuffed fries on Aiba's mouth though deep inside, Nino knew the guy was right._

_\----_

_"You seem to be having a good mood lately," Nino's co-worker at the delivery agency Jun told him while they were having a break. "It's because of Aiba-san, right?"_

_Nino thought it's okay to admit to Jun. Jun wasn't the type who goes tell someone. So he nodded his head. Jun smirked then gave him a tap on the shoulder._

_"That's good. I always thought you'll need someone who'll put up on your changing moods. Besides, Aiba-san seems to be balancing you out."_

_Nino gave Jun an incredulous look. Jun just laughed._

_"You have to find that out by yourself." And Jun went back inside, leaving Nino thinking about what just Jun said._

_Nino has been staring Aiba for quite some time but the other guy didn't seem to be bothered by it as he continued to eat his soba._

_"Nino,"_

_Nino snapped out of his thoughts He caught Aiba stealing his meat. He quickly slapped the other's hand._

_"Oi! That's mine."_

_"I thought you don't want it since you're not eating."_

_"I was thinking of something," Nino picked up the chopsticks and started to eat._

_"About what?"_

_About you, how you seem to be balancing me out as Jun said, but Nino didn't say out loud. Instead, he focused on eating his almost cold soba._

_\----_

_Nino's eyes were glued to the screen as he played videogame he just bought. Meanwhile, Aiba stood behind quietly watching him. They haven't talked ever since they got home._

_"Turn it off, Nino." Aiba said but Nino pretended not to hear._

_Let's talk. Please look at me. Not like this._

_Nino didn't know why but when he came back after getting his things in the locker and logging out, he saw Ohno and Aiba talking friendly each other. Something in his chest hurt as he felt a sickening sensation on his stomach. His eyes followed Aiba's hand friendly touched Ohno. He unconsciously broke the pen he's holding._

_"Masaki, I'm going." He announced loudly then walked out. He didn't even wait for Aiba. He hailed a cab since he didn't bring his motorcycle. Aiba, following Nino quickly, managed to get on the same cab with the other. Neither has spoken on their way to Nino's place._

_Aiba had enough. He went to turn off the TV himself._

_"Now, can we talk?"_

_Nino threw the controller somewhere then stood up._

_"What do you want to talk about?"_

_"Why are you acting like this? Is there something I've done?"_

_"I don't like to see you getting friendly with other people."_

_Aiba remembered what happened earlier._

_"This is about earlier at the store. I was just chatting up at Ohno-san."_

_Nino clicked his tongue then walked to the kitchen to get some water. Aiba followed him, still explaining._

_"Ohno-san is your friend. How can you get jealous to him?"_

_Nino slammed the glass on the counter._

_"I need a smoke," was all Nino could say. He grabbed the pack lying close. He got out their apartment and went down the street. He had to vent out. But Aiba was persistent, still followed him all the way down, calling out him._

_Nino didn't see the cab coming. No, he didn't. What he heard and saw was Aiba screaming at him as he glanced back to tell Aiba to back off._

_\----_

_There were flashing of lights. It was blinding. There were also different unfamiliar voices, calling out to him, yelling at him, telling him to ‘stay and don't go’. Nino didn't know how long it lasted. He blinked away all those things. It felt nightmarish. He wanted to go back where Aiba was. He didn’t know how. So he closed his eyes and tried to shut everything else._

_When he woke up, he was on bed, in his room and Aiba was sleeping beside him, arms around him._

_He closed his eyes again and tried to go back to sleep. A small part of him wondered what happened._

_\----_

_"Do you ever shut up?"_

_Nino said his hand slid down inside Aiba's shirt roaming on the other's warm skin. Aiba shivered._

_"Hm, I don't think---"_

_Nino's lips pressed on his mouth. He was smirking when he pulled away. Aiba's eyes were glassy as they stared back to Nino's playful ones._

_"That's unfair," Aiba was pouting his cherry red lips that Nino found so arousing so he let himself being pulled closer to capture those luscious ones._

_"Kazu," Aiba breathed out near to his ear. Nino felt all his blood went south after hearing Aiba's voice._

_"Hmm... now that's unfair."_

_Aiba chuckled. He knew well what his voice can do to Nino._

_"And I haven't even touched you yet."_

_"My point. That's why you are not allowed to cheat."_

_Aiba hummed in agreement as he spreaded on Nino's neck and bare shoulder open-mouthed kisses. Nino was too focused on Aiba's mouth that he almost forgot the hand until he felt it wrapped around him._

_"Masaki,"_

_Aiba's grip tighten around him and stroke him in fast pace. Few thrusts and a long hard kiss, Nino came. He fell on Aiba's chest, catching up his breath. Then hand rand on his back soothingly. He closed his eyes and fell asleep._

_\----_

_It was raining so hard that night. Nino was feeling restless as he watched the rain pour down as he stood outside the closed music store._

_Aiba was late. He should have been here for an hour. They had always gone home together. It was a deal they had back then._

_Nino wasn't sure what was making him feel anxious. He took out his cigarette and started to light one. The people passing by started to lessen._

_He could not stay still. It felt like something dreadful was about to happen. It hated this feeling. Actually, he hated whenever there's something he has no control of._

_Then he saw or more like heard the ambulance. Usually, he didn't mind others' business however something was making him look. His feet dragged him near to the scene. The first thing he saw was a broken motorcycle. It looked familiar, he thought. He moved closer, hoping to see what the police and paramedics are attending at. The cigarette on his mouth fell._

_Lying on the road with blood all over was Aiba._

_\----_

_"I'm not going anywhere so don't treat me like I'm going to disappear."_

_There's something with Aiba's voice, how he said those words or everything else that Nino wasn't sure. Something was off but Nino didn't want to know at the moment._

_"Masaki,"_

_Nino wasn't sure anymore. There were days when Nino woke up alone and no signs of Aiba. And there was the 'accident'. Until now, he could vividly see in his mind what Aiba looked that day. It was one of the pictures that would never leave Nino's mind. He had sleepless nights because of it, screaming in the middle of the night and calling out Aiba._

_"Kazu."_

_Aiba gripped him hard which Nino knew well that it would leave bruise on the wrist. He didn't say anything as he just kept on staring at Nino, waiting._

_Nino stared back then he slowly made his way to Aiba, straddling on the other's lap. He leaned closer; face inches away with Aiba's. His hands cupped Aiba's face before he pressed his lips on. He felt Aiba's hands on his back and neck. The kiss turned to a passionate and searing one. Both mouths opened up and tongues clashed against each other as both wanted for dominance._

_Nino's the one who pulled away, gasping for air. Aiba didn't stop as he began leaving hot kisses on Nino's jaw to his neck. Nino groaned and unexpectedly ground against Aiba creating a friction that made the latter growled._

_"Kazu, are you sure ---?"_

_Aiba's sentence was cut-off as Nino's lips were already on his._

_He needed this; Nino thought, told himself as he held Aiba's face and kissed him with fervor and passion. And Aiba understood quickly what Nino was trying to say._

_\----_

_“Let’s go on a road trip,” Nino suggested to Aiba. They were lying together on Nino’s bed. Nino’s playing with Aiba’s messy hair while the other was sleeping or pretending to be._

_“Masaki,”_

_“Hmm? Road trip? I’d like that.”_

_“You do? I’ll call my boss then, tell him I need some vacation.” Nino grabbed quickly his phone that was placed on top of the drawer._

_“Nino,”_

_“Hm?” Nino was busy typing he didn’t even spare a look on Aiba._

_“It’s nothing.”_

_“Ready?” Nino asked before he put on his helmet. Aiba, whose arms around on Nino’s waist, nodded in answer._

_“Then here we go,” Nino started the engine. The arms tighten around him and Nino couldn’t stop himself from smiling._

_“Let’s go!” Nino heard Aiba shouted excitedly._

_\----_

_They shouldn’t have gone at all, Nino thought as he looked at Aiba. They should have just stayed at home, played videogames or watched some shows or anything._

_It was a bad idea, the road trip. They shouldn’t have gone._

_This was entirely his fault._

_Nino didn’t want to close his eyes, afraid that Aiba would think he’s gone and at the same time, afraid he wouldn’t wake up._

_“Ma—saki,” his voice croaked while his hand crept toward Aiba who had blood on his face and unconscious._

_The truck appeared nowhere, making Nino changed lanes at last minute._

_“Masaki,” Nino now sobbed. “Please.”_

_Open your eyes,he wanted to say. Open your eyes._

_Nino moved his hand to touch Aiba’s face. It felt cold under his hand now._

_Please let this be a bad dream._

_\----_

"Nino isn't much of a social person ever since he was a kid. He has only talk to us and it took him some time to open up with us. Most of the time, he spends his time alone, playing his game console."

"Has he been acting strange before? Did you notice something off with him?"

"Before we met him, he belonged to the wrong crowd. He had done a lot of bad things without guilt until he met that person. He quit the group he was in and decided to live with that person.”

“Then some years ago, Nino along with that person was involved in a motorcycle accident. Nino was lucky to survive but his friend however died in the scene. He was the closest friend Nino ever had.”

“Nino got so down when he discovered about his friend because of that, he had to take some medications and had to spend a year in the hospital. Eventually, he recovered but it was no longer the Nino I knew. He changed, a lot." Jun tells to the doctor. His eyes take a glance at Nino who's sleeping peacefully inside.

"What kind of change?"

"He was no longer talkative like he used to be. Though he still interacts with other people, I think it was all for show. He had shunned himself from everyone, including me."

"I think the Nino I knew had died some time ago along with our friend."

 

Jun goes to see Nino again. He holds Nino's hand. The sound of the steady beeping sound of the machined is all that fills the room.

"Nino, you have to come back," he whispers softly to the person lying still on bed.

 

\----

The day Nino wakes up from his coma, it’s raining hard. The raindrops are falling heavily on the roof that the sound is reverberating on four corners of the room.

No one can still explain what triggers Nino from waking up although Jun thinks it’s because of the rain. After all, it was raining _that day_.

Jun is getting engrossed with his book when he hears groan. His eyes quickly look at Nino who is actually awake and is trying to move.

“Nino,” Jun almost shouts as he rushes to his side.

"Wha—t happened? Where's Aiba? Where am I?"

"You're in a hospital. We brought you here after I found you at your place, unconscious." Jun answers while he pages the people in the station. Ohno enters with plastic bags on his hands.

"Where's Masaki?" Nino repeats the question Jun fails to answer. Jun pauses and takes a look at Ohno who only looks back him, unsure what to answer.

"Nino, what was the last thing you remember?"

Nino tries to remember. "I was with Aiba. We were on our way home when we got in an accident. Is he alright? I need to see him. How long have I been unconscious?"

"You were in a coma for two years, Nino."

"That can't be true. What about Aiba? Is he doing okay? I need to see him," Nino tries to get up but Jun and Ohno are already there beside him to stop him.

"Aiba!" Nino yells as the two stop him from taking off the lines connected to him. Then a doctor along with nurses barge in.

"Please, I just want to see Aiba." Nino whimpers as the tranquilizers slowly took an effect. Jun reaches for Ohno's hand to hold on as they watch Nino falls asleep.

\----

Nino finds Aiba watching at him as he sits beside him.

"Where were you?" Nino's voice is dry and hoarse.

Aiba smiles at him, reaches for his hand. “I went out for a while. I’m sorry.”

"Don't go anywhere."

Aiba nods his head. His hand reaches for Nino’s. Nino closes his eyes and falls asleep.

\----

“It was not a dream.” Nino quietly says his hand clenched on the sheet. “Aiba was here, holding my hand.”

Jun excuses himself and leaves Ohno and Nino alone. It’s getting harder to bear.

“Jun has been staying by your side for two years. How can it be possible that there’s another person visiting you who we never see?”

Nino doesn’t say anymore and chooses to remain quiet. Ohno lets him be.

 

Jun comes back later. He finds Nino staring outside the window. He silently moves the chair and sits.

"Nino,” Jun says quietly. "Aiba-- he doesn't exist."

Nino's head slowly turns to have a look on Jun. "You're lying."

Jun shakes his head. He wants to tell that truth even though he knows well that Nino. Nino turns to Ohno for answers. It's the same with Jun's.

"But-- he was just here. I saw him earlier. He was standing there."

Nino points the spot near the door just behind Ohno.

"There's only us, no one else Nino."

"But Aiba-- Masaki is..." is real, Nino wants to say, that they are all lying to him. He is damn real. He can remember his face, his scent, his laugh and everything else about him. He's just here before Jun and Ohno, talking to him about not leaving alone. He's so much real.

Jun puts his arms around on trembling Nino. Nino stares at the white sheet, his hands closed tightly.

"Kazu, stop it already. Come back to me, to us."

 

\----

Nino spends another six months for recuperation and rehabilitation. He does a good job, showing signs of improving as his doctor and the health care team would say. So when his evaluation comes back as okay and his doctor sees him fit to go, he finally gets out.

The first thing he does is he goes back to his apartment even though Jun and Ohno insist not to. In his mind, he wants to prove something. Yet on his way, he thinks that perhaps they are right. Aiba doesn't exist as he traces back the places he goes in the past, the 24 hour convenience, the park and the music store. No one remembers Aiba. All this time, he's alone. He is only a figment of his imagination but when he sees the apartment complex, he gets second thoughts. It's the same apartment with Aiba's. He doesn't notice until he reaches his unit, it is on the third floor, the last room on the hallway.

He inserts the key and opens the door. He steps inside, door closing behind him. He drops his bag and goes straight to his room, passing by the living room not sparing a glance at the frames displayed. He pauses for a second when he hears something coming inside from his room. He turns the door knob to open his room's door, holding to his breath.

 

 

"Welcome home, Nino."

 

#

 

A/n: Okay, this is a little maybe a lot confusing. I know because I admit my mind is in a wreck when I wrote this. This is a thought that have been sitting on me for quite some time now (all thanks to the fics and movies with same idea I've read and watched) and I've just decided to give it a try. Let me explain. Nino is under a coma for two years due to overdose. All the events related to Aiba happened only in Nino's imagination. And the reason he got overdosed was because he kept having hallucinations of his old friend which he thought is still alive when in fact had died a long time ago.


End file.
